Childhood.

With the death of so many including a 6 year old girl in the Colorado movie theater shooting it hits so much closer to home when you happen to have a 6 year old little girl. What I am sure started out as a fun memory making experience for that mom and little girl is a night that mother will probably never be able to forgive herself for. We make judgment calls that we could never know the outcome of if something goes wrong and that cold hard fact is that we never could for see it all or change it if something does happen but we also can't hide our children away and keep them from having amazing memories of their childhood. I hope that mother knows that on her daughters last day of life on this earth, she knew she was loved and had a mother who wanted her to be happy and have a life full of good times and memories. We live in a world that tries to make us fear so much and a lot of it is for a good reason I suppose but the fact is we just can't control it all. We can try and protect them from what we think might take place and we can try to be a buffer and shield from all the evil in this world but its just not always possible and facing that fact is harder than most would think, as my children get older I am now going down a road of trying to balance freedom with fear of the unknown, responsibility with protection and all without being an overbearing mother. I suppose this is a burden all parents must bear but this world just doesn't feel like it did when I was little. I had a childhood where I could ride my bike, roller blade, roam and explore my neighborhood without this unshakable fear of something going wrong, now that is not to say bad things didn't happen in my neighborhood and in this world of course sin and evil has roamed this earth for far to long but it just seems to be getting worse and worse as time goes on and unfortunately my kids won't have that carefree running a muck in the neighborhood memories like I had and as much as it saddens me I realize that as their mother I have to make up for this in other areas as well as entrust them to God that he will guide me down this road and protect my children should I make a wrong turn.